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TRT Staff The Mominator
10,503 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Some of these have been around awhile but it's worth a chuckle ;)

> Idiot # 1 I am a medical student currently doing a
>rotation in toxicology at the poison control center.
>Today, this woman called in very upset because she
>caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly
>reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there
>would be no need to bring her daughter into the
>hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the
>conversation happened to mention that she gave her
>daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the
>ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter
>into the emergency room right away. Here's your
>sign, lady. Wear it with pride.
>Idiot # 2 Seems that a year ago, some Boeing
>employees on the airfield decided to steal a life
>raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in
>getting it out of the plane and home. When they took
>it for a float on the river, a Coast Guard helicopter
>coming towards them surprised them. It turned out
>that the chopper was homing in on the emergency
>locator beacon that activated when the raft was
>inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing.
>Here's your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint
>might run.
> Idiot # 3 A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of
>America, walked into the branch and wrote "this iz a
>stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag." While
>standing in line, waiting to give his note to the
>teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him
>write the note and might call the police before he
>reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of
>America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After
>waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to
>the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising
>from his spelling errors that he wasn't the
>brightest light in the harbor, told him that she
>could not accept his stickup note because it was
>written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that
>he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo
>deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking
>somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK" and left. He
>was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting
>in line back at Bank of America. Don't bother with
>this guy's sign. He probably couldn't read it anyway.
> Idiot # 4 A motorist was unknowingly caught in an
>automated speed trap that measured his speed using
>radar and photographed his car. He later received in
>the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car.
>Instead of payment, he sent the police department a
>photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a
>letter from the police that contained another
>picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately
>mailed in his $40.
> Another sign (though this guy might be onto
>something worth thinking about)!
> Idiot # 5 Guy walked into a little corner store with
>a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash
>drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the
>robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind
>the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put
>it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and
>said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The
>robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to
>give it to him because he didn't believe him. At this
>point, the robber took his driver's license out of
>his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked
>it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21
>and he put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran
>from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly
>called the police and gave the name and address of
>the robber that he got off the license. They arrested
>the robber two hours later. Remind me to have more
>signs printed up. Give this guy his!
> Idiot # 6 A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record
>shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one
>shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the
>startled first bandit shot him. This guy doesn't need
>a sign; he probably figured it out himself.
> Idiot # 7 Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer
>pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a
>cinder block through a liquor store window, grab
>some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block
>and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder
>block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the
>head, knocking him unconscious. Seems the liquor
>store window was made of Plexi-Glass. The whole event
>was caught on videotape. Oh, that smarts. Give him
>his sign!
> Idiot # 8 Ann Arbor: The Ann Arbor News crime
>column reported that a man walked into a Burger King
>in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 12:50 A.M., flashed a gun
>and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because
>he said he couldn't open the cash register without a
>food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the
>clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The
>man, frustrated, walked away.

Super Moderator
28,337 Posts
Hehehehe They are good signs of idiocy, Alice!

Stoney ....I vote for the guy with the gun. Good save on the part of the employee :funny:

398 Posts
Ummm, even though you have a gun stuck in my face, and your dancing around all nervous as heck, and have to be partially insane, you still have to order a food item???? or ****, he has a gun, I am going to hit every **** button on this thing until I can get it open!
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