[MontanaRocknReefer]

My wife got this blonde joke from a lady in one of her craft rooms on the internet! So thought I would pass it on!

A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains.

She tells the salesman:

"I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen".

The surprised salesman replies: "But madam, computers do not have curtains...".

And the blonde said: "Der Helloooo....I've got Windooooows!!!!!!"

 

[asmith]

Hehe. I will add a couple.

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

***************************************************

FINAL EXAM

The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the
answer sheet:
Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails. Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out. During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.
The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on.
"I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."

****************************************************

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

There was a blonde woman who was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note: "I have kidnapped
your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7 A.M. Signed, The Blonde." She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket and told him to go straight home.
The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed.
Inside the bag was the following note....
"Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this to another.

 

[Guest]

wow...........

 

[Casey]

Well since you guys like to make fun of my wifes hair color heres on back at ya Whats a brunette between two blondes? Invisible

 

[Stang69]

A blond, brunette and redhead were in a contest to swim the English Channel. The rules were all had to do the breast stroke. The race was on.

The brunette swam to the finish line in record time. The redhead was not far behind. Many hours later and exhausted blond finally drags across the finish line.

She reports to the judge that she thinks the other 2 cheated.

He asked why she thought that.

She explained well, this contest was to use the breast stroke sir and they used their arms...

 

[Guest]

ding ding we have a winner

 

[Reefer Addict]

Whats a brunette between two blondes?

I thought that was an interpreter.

 

[Guest]

once again wow........

a brunete was walking down some railroad tracks where she came across a blonde jumping across saying 36...36...36..36.. the brunte asked what are you doing? playing a game said the blonde wana play? sure said the brunete and they both were jumping across the tracks saying 36...36.....36....36.... when all of a sudden the blonde jump outa the way and SMACK..... the brunete was crushed by a train......after it had paseed the blonde got back on and started jumping 37...37...37..37....

 

[Casey]

:funny: :funny:

 

[CAT]

TWO BLONDES IN HEAVEN

One blonde says to another, "How did you die?"

"I froze to death," says the second.

"That's awful," says the first blonde. "How does it
feel to freeze to death?"

"It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second
blonde."You get the shakes, and you get pains in all
your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very
calm way to go. You get numb
and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How
about you, how did you die?"

"I had a heart attack," says the first blonde.

"You see I knew my husband was cheating on me, so one
day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the
bedroom, and found him alone watching TV.
I ran to the basement, but no one was hiding there. I
ran to the second floor, but no one was hiding there
either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and
just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and
died.

The second blonde shakes her head. "What a pity if you
had only looked in the freezer, we'd both still be
alive."

 

[geshields]

A few days ago I was having some work done at Eastgate Ford. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"

She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one....." She said that she did not know what it was but this piece had always been there. He gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?"

She pointed and said, "Of course, it's right > there <--- Click here

 

[Guest]

omfg

 

[Doug1]

OK redhead goes to the Dr and tells him she hurts all over, pokes several spots all over her body and wincing in pain.
The Dr looks at her and says "your not a natural redhead are you?"
She admits no, shes actually blonde but changed color cause of all the jokes.
The Dr then treated her for a broken finger

 

[uurt]

:funny: Ok, I couldn't resist.

This blonde calls her boyfriend, "Please come over and help me with this REALLY hard jigsaw puzzle"

So he gets to her place, and she takes him. Sure enough, there are pieces all over the table. She says "It's supposed to be this tiger, but I'm having trouble" as she shows him the box.

He replies "You're never going to get a tiger out of this, lets go get a drink, then come back here. You can sit and relax, and I'll put these frosted flakes back in the box"

 

[Doug1]

 

[Guest]

omg

 

[Stang69]

ROFL!!!!!!!

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde. Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."
Suddenly the brunette yells, "earthquake!!"
Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.
The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."
The redhead then screams, "tornado!!"
Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.
By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She also says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."
The blonde shouts, "fire!!"

 

[Deborah]

Ouch, ouch...but my husband and I have told the "Swiming the English Channel" joke several time in the last week with great success. Thanks!

 

[Alice]

Why is there always such a mess in the kitchen after a blond makes chocolate chip cookies?





Getting the M&M's out of their little shells is *really* hard!

LOL

 

[Guest]

hehe