testing, just ignore this thread

[tims]

so does that mean women should not speak at all?



j/k it was out there so i had to take the shot....

[tdwyatt]

[Doug1]

Originally Posted by tdwyatt

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit with the "J" crew one evening. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and her move landed her on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a moment, then asked, "Is the vacuum on or off?"

Oh Man you are killing me Tom

[Phishnoob]

Originally Posted by tims

so does that mean women should not speak at all?



....

Oh I so dare you to say that to the lovely and gracious Mrs. Phish

[tdwyatt]

(* I didn't realize we had automatic censoring... )

[salt creepette]

what's silent and smells like carrots?

bunny farts.

confucious say: man who fart in church sits in own pew.
it take many boards to build crib, only one screw to fill it.
man who stand on toilet, high on pot.

how do you drown a blonde? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.

[tdwyatt]

note: I can't believe I got bleeped...

OK, here is the apolitical sanitized version:


Through some incredible piece of luck, (candidate B for president) and (candidate K for president, you fill in the blanks for your favorite presidential candidates) somehow ended up at the same barbershop for a haircut As they sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word was spoken. The barbers were even afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn to politics and an ensuing debate.

As the barbers finished their shaves and trims, the one who had (Candidate K) in his chair reached for the aftershave. Candidate K was quick to stop him saying, "No thanks, my wife will smell that and think I've been in a who**house!!!"

The second barber turned to Candidate B and said, "How about
you, Mr. (sir)?"

Candidate B turned so candidate K would hear him and replied, "Go ahead, my wife doesn't know what the inside of a who**house smells like."





jeeze...

[tdwyatt]

well, at least it soesn't ID any particular party orientation...

[Doug1]

**** thats like having to listen to the sanitized version of the Bob and Tom Show
Still funny tho

[Phishnoob]

Wow this thread censor is tough...hrrmmm what works here *****, *****, ****, ****, weenie, dangit I was a sailor and I am out of words all ready. One last try...doodiehead

[JennM]

Doodiehead?

Now dem's fighting words!!!

[Stang69]

Blonde enters a store that sell curtains. She tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains.

The salesman assured her that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed her several patterns, but the blond seemed to be having a hard time choosing.

Finally she selects a lovely pink floral print.

The salesman asked what size curtains she needed.

The blond replies "fifteen inches."

"Fifteen inches???" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"

The blond tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for her computer monitor.

The surprised salesman replies, "but, Miss, computers do not have curtains!"

The blond says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!"

[tdwyatt]

quiz time!!!

First correct answer gets a special prize, to be determined by the ouidji ball:

Three elderly ladies are excited about seeing their first baseball game.
They smuggle a bottle of Jack Daniel's into the ballpark. The game is
real exciting and they are enjoying themselves immensely mixing the Jack
Daniel's with soft drinks.

Finally one of them passes out. Soon they realize that the bottle is
almost gone and the game has a lot of innings to go.

Based on the given information, what inning is it and how many players
are on base?

[JennM]

It's the bottom of the fifth and the bags are loaded.

[JennM]

(Was that the test we were supposed to ignore?)